This week's lesson for me had to do with communication. I was taking one of my early morning walks on Saturday when I encountered a lone crow sitting on a wire above my head, crowing loudly. With the hills and woods so close, and the usual weekday noise gone as people slept in, it echoed quite loudly. The crow sent out four sharp calls, followed a few seconds later by the sound of another crow, perhaps a block or two away to his right, sending back exactly four calls. A few seconds later, the first crow repeated the four calls, only to be answered again, but this time from a crow a few blocks to his left. What fascinated me about this avian conversation was the fact that each crow waited a few seconds, then sent back the exact same sound. It was almost as if they were actually listening to what was being said before they responded.
It occurred to me as I listened that most of the time, humans may listen, but they don't really hear what's being said. They are only interested in their response, which they start formulating before the other speaker is actually finished. We listen to respond, not to actually hear what the other person is saying. When we do that, we miss so much. We miss the actual meaning of what is being said, the tone of voice, the nuances in speech that may indicate something quite different from what is being said. Generally, people respond to, "So, how are you?" with "fine," when, if we really listened, we would hear that "fine" was definitely not what the other person was feeling. Maybe, like the crows, we need to pause and give ourselves a chance to really hear all that is being said before we respond. Maybe, if we truly listen, we will hear ourselves in the thoughts and feelings of others. In fact, now that I think about it, that is probably exactly what those crows were doing ... consciously participating in community.
And so it is.
